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Printer Friendly Version“My times are in your hands.” It can actually be
translated, “My seasons are in your hands.” My times, my seasons
are in your hands.
It happened a few weeks ago. I am still feeling the effects
of it: daylight savings time. It is light longer and longer at night, so you
can’t wind down and go to bed early, and it is darker in the morning.
For those of us who like to get up early, life becomes a struggle. If I get
up and run early in the morning, I am running in the dark. By the end of the
summer, I wind up needing to go to bed half an hour after dark in order to
get 7 hours of sleep. I used to try to rebel against that but it just doesn’t
work. I simply have to admit: the times when I wake up and go to bed, those
times are in the hands of the people who decided the central standard time
zone daylight savings. When the seasons change, my clock changes. My times
are not in my hands, neither are my seasons.
I’ve noticed that about some other people too. I know
a man named Brad who works for a landscape company in Kansas City. He lives
outside the city. Depending on the particular job, when he leaves in the morning,
his morning drive can be more than an hour. Brad was the chairman of the church
board, so he would come home on weekends and lead meetings. When they had
their first child, they decided that his wife, Glenda, would move from full-time
work as a nurse to part-time, just a couple of shifts per week. When those
were daytime shifts, they would find a sitter. Brad kept on working full-time,
and Glenda went to half-time. It was a stretch when the second one came along.
As you can imagine this shift meant bills went up and income and benefits
didn’t.
As the bills escalated and the salary didn’t, they realized
that if they could just make it to the time that their youngest got into school,
the kids would be occupied during the day and some time would be freed up.
Glenda could then go back to working full-time and they would be able to climb
out of the hole. Brad might even be able to take a little cut, which would
allow him to look for a job closer to home. They were looking forward to the
extra time school would allow. Six months before that was supposed to happen,
Glenda met Brad at the door one evening with one of those silly smiles on
her face. In fact, she was glowing. Yep, number three came along and Glenda
going back to work was not really an option. In their location, daycare was
really not much of a possibility either. After that third little one came
along, the bills seemed to multiply and there were even some weeks when buying
groceries was a challenge.
Brad was up before the crack of dawn to drive an hour and half
to work, and then work what seemed at times to be very long hours. Glenda
tried to work in a couple of 12 hour evening shifts per week, but just the
phone calls to work childcare were time-consuming. Two days per week, Brad
was gone all day and she was gone all night. When they were together, they
were exhausted. Their times were not in their hands.
Have you ever noticed that time is not really in our hands?
All along the way, life seems to weave a net one strand at a time. When we
are young adults and just starting to make decisions on our own, the mail
starts coming: fancy letters that tell us that we are qualified for a “great
introductory rate.” The commercials and the things others buy tell us
that we are a little less of a person if we don’t have or wear some
particular thing. Almost every day there is a call that tries to get us to
sign up for some kind of payment here or there for something that everyone
really needs. For some, going to college stacks up some pretty heavy financial
responsibility over the long haul. One of the ropes woven into the net is
the debt that is imbedded in the life of nearly every young adult in the world.
About that time, along comes that special someone. There has
got to be time for dating, a minimum of several hours per week together. Dating,
a wedding and then a honeymoon all on a credit card--got to get home from
that trip and get to work! Got to work like crazy, so we can afford to spend
money like crazy, when we are together.
Along come children. In case you hadn’t noticed, they
require more income. You bought a sack of diapers lately? We’ve got
baby showers coming up. One tonight in fact, we got to help those people out!
When the baby comes, more money is needed and that requires more time. A second
job, some work on weekends, perhaps a home business.
But when the baby comes, more time for work isn’t the only thing needed.
I want to conduct a short survey of those who are gathered here this morning.
Of those in this room who have had children: When your children came along,
did you need more income? How many of you parents here, when thinking about
total time in both your schedules, after your child came along, did it free
up a few more hours for you to spend some time working? Time was needed for
rocking, and changing, and playing, and dreaming, and taking them to grandma’s
house, and to the doctor’s office every two weeks. Then there are school
programs, and violin lessons, and soccer practice--all stuff you really want
to do.
On Thursday I ask Bethany, “What is tomorrow?” And
she says, “Daddy Day.” Sure, for her it is “Daddy Day,”
but in reality it is Bethany and Sarah day. If you have small kids, you know
as well I do, your day off is not your day, it’s their day. Don’t
laugh at me. I’ve been to the soccer field. Moms, dads uncles, aunts,
grandmas and grandpas all over that place. Your day off is not your day, it’s
theirs. Your times are not in your hands. They are in theirs, and you are
thrilled
They bring great joy and blessing into our lives. Time with
them is the most enjoyable time we spend; but the fact is we spend time with
them. In case you have forgotten they will be out of school in six weeks.
It’ll be summer, more time with them. So there will be some more time
you spend. By the way, the grass will be growing then so you will have to
mow the lawn too.
Such is the life for moms and dads. The rope of essentials,
the rope of debt, the rope of some hobby, the rope of work, the rope of family
life all weave together to create this net that seems hidden until it has
caught all our time. No question about it for parents, our time is not in
our hands. Most of our time is in the hands of our job or the hands of our
kids.
What about the kids and teenagers? Their time is in their hands,
right? I’m getting older, but my memory recalls times in high school
when my sister would have a junior high basketball game just after school,
then I would have a high school game in the evening. Mom would put something
in the crock pot and leave us a note telling us to get what we needed and
she would see us at the games after she got off work. I remember those seasons
were quite long. I also remember we would have something like 20-25 games
per year. The philosophy was that kids needed time for other things as well
as sports. They need to be well-rounded individuals. I haven’t checked
to see how many games the soccer teams and basketball teams have here per
year, but in Memphis I know that it was more like 50. The philosophy has changed.
Keep them busy and you keep them out of trouble. And there is another strand,
another rope in the net that catches all our time. Their times are in the
hands of a coach.
It is not just that way for kids and parents. At some point,
the house empties out. I’ve known several people in that age group.
I am their pastor. Some of them talk to me. Talk to one of them some time
and ask them what they are doing. That season of life is called middle age
for a reason. They are not the young generation or the older generation, they
are in the middle.
Some of them will tell you that about two days after they stopped
making decisions for and caring for their children they started making decisions
for and caring for their parents. This can often take just as much or more
time and can be just as stressful, if not more so. I’m told in the middle
age season of life your times are not in your hands either.
We work and care and live, and work and care and live, and pay and save, and
our time is not our own. Then at some point we retire, and our time is in
our hands . . . maybe. I have a friend named Ann. She is well into her 70’s.
She raised her children, who as young adults were devastated by life circumstances.
Some were brought on by their own actions; some were things they couldn’t
control. Ann stepped in and raised her grandchildren. But that was long before
I knew her. By the time I knew her, she was looking back and telling stories
about raising her children and her grandchildren who were themselves now adults.
She was still driving a mini-van; raising her great-grandchildren. Yep. She
was driving those little ones all over town. When they weren’t in school,
they were with great-grandma, driving around to soccer practice and school
events.
If that doesn’t happen to you, something else might. I
tried to call a couple in their seventies last week. I tried for three days,
but couldn’t reach them. I thought maybe they were out of town but finally
got a call back. I found out they had gone from one doctor’s appointment
to another for two days. Are your times in your hands? I’ve never met
anyone of any age who wrote in their Palm Pilot, “Have a heart attack
next Thursday.”
“Can’t wait until summer, then my time will be in
my hands.” No, a lawn mower will be in your hands. “Can’t
wait until graduation, then my time will be in my hands.” Not for long.
You will probably have a nail gun, a pencil, a palm pilot, or a cell phone
in your hands. Can’t wait until the kids are grown, then my time will
be in my hands. Not if your parents are alive. Can’t wait until I retire,
then my time will be in my hands. Probably not, if there are a generation
or two of people around you who’ve grown to love and depend on you.
It’s as if each phase of life season is a strand of rope, that woven
together with the others creates a net, sometimes obvious, sometimes hidden,
that quietly, secretly forms over our life, catching all our time.
As the seasons have changed in your life, have you ever taken
a look at your life and said, “At this age, I should have a family or
a spouse?”. “At this point in my life, I shouldn’t still
be working this kind of job.” “At this age, I should have achieved
this goal or crossed that milestone by now.” The reality is the strands
of life have become a net that is hidden for us until it has captured all
our time. Honestly, it is pretty common to look back on the times of our lives
with a little sorrow or even a little shame.
I’ve heard of people who suddenly woke up one day and
felt as though they were in a net of debt and bad relationships. Time was
running out, and they tried to disentangle themselves from it. They were hemmed
in by life’s net, felt their spirit was suffocating and needed to get
free. You’ve heard of people like that. They quit a job, got a divorce,
left church, moved away and got unlisted phone numbers. If you ask somebody
who’s done all that, and if they are really honest, they will tell you
about moving costs, alimony and child support, not to mention a desperate
search for new friends. When the creditors find them, the interest added to
the debts, probably means that eventually they go from working 40-60 hours
to somewhere around 70-90 hours of work to pay it all off, and they have no
foundation for relationships upon which to stand.
When a tiger gets caught in the net, if they don’t tranquilize
the tiger soon, his restless spirit has him trying to get free. He gets more
and more tangled, with no solid place to stand. It’s almost as if our
times, the seasons of our lives will never be in our hands, not for long anyway.
We don’t see all those changes coming. They are like a net hidden for
us and the more we try to get out, the more entangled we can become.
Do you feel like your times are not in your hands? Let me just
say that you’re in good company. When you read through the Gospels,
you know that when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son.
In the book of Luke, He was anxious about getting to His Father’s business.
As a twelve-year-old, He ditched His parents and went to the temple to teach
and learn. In the book of Matthew, when the disciples are trying to cast out
a demon without praying, and can’t, Jesus responds, “You wicked
and perverse generation how much longer must I put up with you?” (17:17).
In fact in John He says, “My time has not yet come, but your time is
always here.” (7:6, NRSV). He talked about the time for Him to die for
their sins. Not only did the Son of God submit to time and the seasons of
life, when He taught the disciples about the end of time, He confessed that
He, the Son of God, knew neither the day nor the hour. When you think about
it, in earthly time, He had less than most of us. When He was only 33, He
spent a few hours hanging on the cross because He had willingly placed His
time for death in the hands of men who crucified Him. I guess it’s true:
when you walk the earth, no matter who you are, your times are not in your
hands.
I guess the question becomes, what in the world are we doing
sitting here? I mean, if you were here for Sunday school, you will be here
for the better part of two and a half hours. Many of you will be back tonight
and even Wednesday evening. Not to mention the fact that when you come see
me, or go and see your small group leader or Sunday school teacher and say,
“I’m way too busy,” you are going to hear us say, “Are
you spending enough time in prayer? Are you opening the Bible every day?”
Anyone who is thinking logically is going to say, “Now wait a minute,
won’t that take more time? Isn’t that just one more rope in the
net that catches all my time? I’m looking to have less to do.”
While Jesus hung there on the cross, He said something very
interesting. They are words He was quoting from this passage. He says, “Into
your hand I commend my spirit” (Luke 23:46). He breathed His last and
was taken down and buried. Three days later God raised Him from the dead.
Forty days after that he ascended into heaven and transcended time. That prayer
of Jesus is a great prayer for us to pray when our own death is approaching.
But what about on days when our death seems distant and we are just trapped
in the net of time?
Not long ago, I was at Brad’s house to visit for a few
days. I noticed that there were some good Christian books there on the counter
and some Bible study material. Glenda told me that Brad had begun reading
Christian material more and more in recent days. Now Brad is a long-time Christian,
faithful to the church, but he seemed to be having a bit of a revival. The
net was drawn and his time was not his own; but somewhere in between the long
commute and loving his three kids and wife, he was feeding his soul here and
there as often as he could, and praying. His time was out of his hands but
he was committing his spirit to the Lord.
It was just a few weeks later we got a call. Brad had put in
an application for a government job about five miles from where they living.
He liked the sound of it, but it was a little municipality and he knew they
couldn’t pay him enough or provide good benefits. But it was landscaping
work and it was close, so he put in for it. They called him back for a second
interview. He told Glenda he didn’t want to go because he thought it
would be a waste of precious time. She said, “It can’t hurt. Just
go.” He went. They talked and things were positive, but they still didn’t
tell him what he would be making. They called him back for a third interview,
and again he almost didn’t go--it was just taking too much of his time.
But in the midst of praying and reading, he decided he’d better see
this through.
When they told him his salary, it was comparable. When they
told him his benefits, he realized they would actually be in a little better
shape with just 40 hours than before with overtime. Then they said something
else. They said, “This is a budgeted item for the municipality and under
no circumstances, at any time, are you to ever work overtime.” This
man who wants desperately to be a good father can leave work and go eat lunch
with his family. Between overtime and the commute, he has basically freed
up between 2 1/2 and 4 hours a day to help with his wife and kids.
“You have delivered me from the net that was hidden for
me.” Our times are not in our hands, and that can be an incredible source
of stress and strain and struggle. Or, it can simply be our cue to commit
our spirits to the hands who hold our times, and trust that when the time
is right He will deliver us.
Our times are in His hands. Shouldn’t our spirits be also?